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This is the absolutely, positively,
nearly 100 percent, almost exact
account of our lack of phone serv-
ice lastMonday andTuesday.
“Hello Mam. This is Jeff from
Comcast. So what's the problem?
Howcan I help you today?”
The problem is that we don't
have phone service, Jeff. That's the
problem. The other problem is that
I have now spoken with at least six
different people from your organi-
zation, none of whom appear to
have spoken to each other. I have
spent more than 3 hours on the
phone with various people from
your office so far today and at least
that long yesterday, and I still have
no phone service.
“Well, Mam, I can't help that. I
don't have any information about
that, I was just given your number
and asked to give you a call. I don't
even know which numbers are shut
off.”
Then what number did you use
to call me, Jeff? And if you can't
help me solve the problem, why
DID you call me? I need phone
service. I've been paying for phone
service and have never been so
much as late with a payment and
you people shut my phones off.
Monday and Tuesday are my
busiest days. I am going out of busi-
ness here while people from your
office keep calling and telling me
they will have someone else call
me. We are on deadline. We need
our phones.
“Hello, Mam, this is Mike from
Comcast. So what's the problem
today and howcan I help?”
If you don't already know, then
WHY DID YOU CALL ME??? You
shut my phones off and can't get
them back on, that's the problem,
Mike. I've talked to nearly all your
co-workers. Turn my phones back
on right now.
“Well, I can just take your com-
plaint down to the other department
and see if they canhelp you, OK?”
NO, NO, NONONO that is NOT
OK. Take my number to someone
who can actually fix the problem
and getmy phones turnedback on.
“Hello Mam, this is Pete from
Comcast. Well, according to our
records, we turned off the forward-
ing phone lines at the customer's
request.”
Well, Pete, your records are
wrong. Nobody here requested that
our phones be shut off. NOBODY.
Trust me, we did not call your serv-
ice center in India or the
Philippines and ask anybody to
shinny up the nearest pole and
shut down our business. We need
our phones back up and working
right damnNOW.
“Well, I will have to have some-
body else call you back. I don't han-
dle this type of complaint. Phone
service is heavily regulated and we
need signed forms. Homeland
Security regulates that.”
Then call Homeland Security. I
WANT MY DAMN PHONES
TURNED BACK ON RIGHT
NOW! If you turned them off, you
can turn them back on and you
turned them off yesterday without
any signed forms from anybody
including Homeland Security. Now,
turn themback on.
“Hello Mam? This is Steve from
Comcast. Well, Jeff from the Level II
Tech Department says we can't turn
your phones on without an affidavit
of portability access fromyou andwe
don't have one of those in the file.”
YESYOUDO!!! We filled out all
that paperwork more than two
years ago and we paid you for it.
Your office had all the paperwork
you needed until somebody shut
my phones off yesterday. Then you
sent me more forms which I filled
out, got notarized and faxed back.
Turn my phones back on. How
fracking hard can that be?
“Hello Mam. This is Don from
Comcast. Well, we seem to have
found the prob-
lem but I don't
know if we can
fix it because we would have to get
somebody from the Level Five Tech
Department. They are the only ones
authorized to access these lines and
they are not allowed to deal with the
public. Um, I do see a new note from
one of the techs, however, t
hat this
was an error on our part.”
Then toddle off to the secret lab
where these super-geeks hide and
get them to turn my phones back
on, Don. NOW!! RIGHT NOW!!!
Were they playing World of
Warcraft with my phone lines or
what?Turnmy phones on.
“Hello Mam. This is Doug from
Comcast. We need to talk to the tech
department about your phones but I
don't have access to their numbers. It
takes a higher security clearance
than I have. So I'll have to have
somebody call you back.
NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO. Just
get somebody to turn my phones
back on…..
“Hello, mam, this is Billie Jo from
Comcast Customer Service. Howcan
I help you today?”
Billie Jo, you can get my phones
turned back on. I am going out of
business here because people from
your office keep calling me but
nobody can turn my phones back
on. You are the tenth person I have
talked to and nobody can help. You
turned my phones off for no dis-
cernable reason and now you
apparently do not have the ability
or technical know-how to push the
button or flip a switch or feed the
gerbil powering the system by run-
ning on his little wheel and turn
themback on. I needmy phones on
A
SSOCIATED
N
EWSPAPERS OF
M
ICHIGAN
P
AGE
4
November 7, 2013
See
Billie Jo
, page 5
We'd very much like the politi-
cal rhetoric surrounding the new
AffordableHealthCareAct to stop.
Really. Just stop. Because all the
political posturing, on both sides,
and the failure to operate in a
manner within the law and in the
best interest of the public is mak-
ing people sick. The frustration of
attempting to sign up on obtain
information on the overtaxed and
under tested website is a debacle
of the first water.
This roll out is an embarrass-
ment to the White House and
should be shared by anyone who
had anything to dowith it. Will they
fix it? The answer to that is pretty
simple. They have to.
This AffordableHealthCareAct
is the law. The members of the
Supreme Court, in their infinite
wisdom, have declared it to be just
that. The law of our land. It is now
the responsibility of the various
federal agencies involved to pro-
vide the information and the
enrollment promised to and
expectedby theAmericanpeople.
That the website was poorly
designed or not properly tested or
rushed into by those in authority is
a secondarymatter. As Al Sharpton
said: "The act set out to provide
affordable health care. It didn't set
out to provide a great website."
He could be right because this
website sure doesn't do the job it
should.
We don't care which party the
programmers belong to and we
don't care what went wrong. What
we care about is now that this new
law is going into effect, potential
subscribers deserve the means to
utilize it in away thatmight benefit
themand their families.
Washington needs to work on
getting this fixed, right now, rather
than playing the blame game.
These silly arguments and political
speeches really are making people
sick.
Next Monday, Nov. 11 will be the annual celebration
across our country of VeteransDay.
Originally called Armistice Day memorializing the
armistice which became effective the 11th hour of the 11th
day of the 11th month ending the fighting between Germany
and the Allies, it officially became a holiday in the United
States in 1926, and a national holiday 12 years later. On June
1, 1954, the name was changed to Veterans Day to honor all
U.S. veterans.
Throughout our communities there are memorial events
planned, some large and elaborate, others smaller, but no
less sincere in their intent to honor those who have served
our country in the military. We admit, this is a holiday that
touches us farmore emotionally than it once did.
We, like so many other Americans, are more deeply
moved andmore appreciative of those who serve in our mili-
tary than we were before 9-11 and our country's involvement
in two wars. We are far more aware, like most other
Americans, of the real danger and threats these men and
women face on a daily basis and of the debt of gratitude we
as a nation and as individuals owe these people.
As individuals, there is very little we can do about the
hardships these men and women face when they return
home from war and deployment. We cannot help them, it
seems, cope with the miles of paperwork and obstacles
placed in their path they try to obtain the medical treatment
they need and are entitled to. The literal tons of paperwork
regarding their claims that are left unprocessed that fills an
entire floor of an office building inWashington, D.C. isn't any-
thing that we can help process. We can't make Washington
help these men and women get the benefits and help they
are due through anymeasure other than at the ballot box and
many of us are not even sure of the best way to do that.
What we can do, however, is continue to put pressure
whenever we can on those we have elected to make these
men and women a priority. We can continue to support every
measure that might help them, when they return, to find
work, to find help and to find the life in America that they
fought for. What we can also do is support the collection
efforts sponsored by so many groups to send items our ser-
vicemen and women need to them while they are stationed
so far away. These groups collect all types of items that these
soldiers and sailors need as they continue to battle to pre-
serve our freedoms. When you see or read about one of these
efforts, we urge you to try to help in any way possible. A tube
of Chap-Stik, a package of pre-sweetened Kool-Aid or a pair
of socks may seem such a small thing to donate and yet, to
those fighting in Iraq or Afghanistan, or any of those sta-
tioned inmany other places around the globe, those are luxu-
ries worth a king's ransom. Those are just a few examples of
the everyday items that groups collect and that servicemen
and women value and can use. Lists are always available
fromthe various groups undertaking the collection effort.
This one day set aside to honor our veterans formally is
more than appropriate. It is well deserved and we should
each take the real meaning and importance of the day seri-
ously. We should try to imbue that sense of importance, grati-
tude and respect for those serving in our armed forces with
the youth and children of today, teaching them that this is a
serious remembrance and not some empty holiday without
real impact or importance in their lives.
No matter what your politics are, whether you support or
decry the American military efforts currently under way
across the world, the men and women serving those aims
deserve our gratitude and our respect.
Demonstrating that respect in every way possible is one of
the things we can do, not only onVeteran's Day, but every day.
When we see them on the street, in stores or shops, or any-
where, we can at the very least smile and nod in acknowl-
edgement of our gratitude for their service. We can open a
door for them, let them precede us in a long line at the bank
or grocery store, buy thema cup of coffee, or pick up their tab
for lunch.
Whateverwe cando, they deservemore.
This one day set aside to
honor our veterans formally
is more than appropriate.
”
Veterans deserve gratitude, respect every day
Rhetoric
isn’t solution
Trust me, we did not call your service center
in India or the Philippines and ask anybody to shinny
up the nearest pole and shut down our business.
”
A grateful and apologetic ‘Ode to Billie Jo’